A funny thing happened to us last night, we were sent a phone number and given leave to text it with questions. The reason? Enigmatic outfit Black Honey have released a new tune online, the superb “Teenager”, and in preparation, they would answer any question we had. Given that it is clearly mystery week on Alphabet Bands, what with the secretive Eyelid Kid featuring yesterday and the ‘didn’t’ they used to be…’ Jagaara on the site morning, this was a fantastic chance to actually find something out about a band and share some information.
Embolden with this power we took some time to think about what we should ask. Clearly this was a great opportunity and not one we should just piss away by doing something stupid. Then it came to us, the question to end all questions, the one thing we and surely all mankind would want to know more than anything else. So, with our hands shaking and our brow furrowed with nervous excitement, we texted…
“If you were travelling in a car at the speed of light and you turned on the headlights, would anything happen?”*
Seconds felt like a lifetime as we waited for a response, exhilarated and anxious. Would we get a response and if so, what would it say. Then, at last, it came…
“You probably wouldn’t need headlights if you were going that fast because your car is magical evidently you also have lazer vision”.
Mind, as they say, blown. And how did they know about our laser eyes?
Anyway, whilst others may have asked about their names, background and the like, we went for a more existential route and proceeded to have a discussion about what powers we may or may not have, murder as a hobby, colouring in difficult patterns and the relative relaxation/stress merits of such an activity.
We think you’ll agree, that was totally the best use of our questions…
As for the song, “Teenager” is a fantastic blend of light and dark. Like an underground speakeasy with the light shining in from small ground level windows. Melody, rhythm and vocals all blend as one like dust particles twirling in the shafts of daytime beaming down into the bar. People will smile and laugh amongst the half-light while the world carries on unaware above. Feet cast shadows as they move along the pavement while feet create shapes as they dance freely across the floor. At the end of the bar a girl waits happily, her face brightening as her loved one approaches. Footloose and fancy free, no doubt contemplating the world and all they wonders and mysterious questions held within it.
Should you wish to contact the band and ask bonkers questions, you can text them on: +447578533359
* With thanks to the Steven Wright school of how to conduct yourself in an interview for the inspiration.
Stalk Black Honey: Twitter